Better or Worse?

**DISCLAIMER: This was written and SHOULD have been posted on November 4th. I didn’t notice that I hit save instead of publish…**

For the last several months, all that has been on TV, the papers, Google news and pretty much anywhere else you want to look, has been the election. Most of the blogs I read at least have mentioned it, if not talked about it in great length. Finding out info about the candidates and issues is easier than easy. Its almost like you would have to TRY not to know about them. And that’s exactly what I did. I didn’t listen to a single speech or debate. I didn’t read a single article or blog about it. I didn’t engage in a single conversation about the election; not the candidates, not the issues, not taxes, not the environment. Nothing. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had friends that have tried. I’m not an idiot, and I’m opinionated, so all of my friends (who are all quite political, which is odd to me) wanted to know what I thought about certain issues, hoping to have a good debate about them (because I LOVE debates…no, that is not sarcasm, that is serious), and they were all shocked when I said I didn’t know. Most of them thought that I was being coy and wanted them to work harder to get me to talk about it. Not the case. I honestly didn’t know.

So…why am I like this? Why did I steadfastly refuse to pay attention to ANYTHING having to do with the election? There are a few reasons, which I will try to explain now.

1) I never know what to believe. The media and people in general skew things so badly that I can never tell what is real and what is fake. What actually happened and what is being made up to inflate ratings. There are certain issues that I really do care about, but I never know what is truth and what is fiction. I never know who is telling the truth and who is lying.

2) I don’t know who the key players are. I hear names that mean nothing to me. These are people who were important before the election and who will be important no matter who wins, and I don’t know who they are or what they do or why they are important. Because of this, I feel incredibly stupid and out of the loop. And because looking them up and memorizing what they do would take a lot of time and energy, and I am extremely lazy, I don’t feel like wasting my time to do this.

3) I don’t know anything about the stock market. So when people talk about it, as they inevitably will, everything they say just sounds like numbers and letters, much like algebra or calculus. Again, I’m sure I can learn, but since it doesn’t impact my day to day life, I can’t make myself care enough to look into it.

And that is the main point here: does it impact my day to day life? No matter who wins, I will get up and go to work the next day. I will put gas in my truck, no matter how expensive or cheap it is, because I have to. I will still get married to the man of my dreams. I will still be able to do the things I love doing. And I will continue to live my life as I have been for the last 24 years.

So…I am 24, and have been able to vote in 2 presidential elections so far. And I didn’t vote in either. Is it better that I didn’t blindly vote for people and issues and promises that I didn’t understand…or worse? I think it’s better. At least that’s what I tell myself…

Never satisfied…

So, as I mentioned, GTO guy and I are officially completely moved. We are in a bigger, better, nicer apartment. He loves his job, I love mine (I got a job in another call center doing warranty replacements for a major cell phone carrier, and I LOVE IT!). We have been down here for exactly a month as of today…and we are trying to buy a house. I know…pretty crazy, huh? For some reason, GTO guy and I do not know how to take things slowly, lol! If you remember our story and how we met, it basically went like this:

1st night: hung out til 4 in the morning

2nd-10th day: hung out every day, all day (or, as much time as my job allowed)

11th day: Said I love you to each other (and no, we are not “those type of people”. I’d only said it one other person, and that was after 6 months, and I was with that guy for 4 years, and he only said it to one other girl, and he was also with her for 4 years…so….yeah…this was different for both of us)

14th day: I officially moved into his apartment with him

2.5 months: he gave me promise/birthday ring

4 months: He proposed

7 months: we move halfway across the country together

8 months: we are looking to buy a house together

Yes…we’ve only been together 8 months (tomorrow will be exactly 8 months, actually). And under normal circumstances, neither one of us is really impulsive. We look at a decision from both sides, and then carefully weigh pros and cons. that’s not to say we’re not doing that now….we’re just doing it much faster. I am super excited and we are going to see the finance guy on Monday…wish us luck!

Also, now that I have a set schedule and have set time off and such, hopefully I will get back into the bloggy way of life!

Just Checkin In…

Hey everyone…I know you’ve all been very concerned, but no, I am not dead. My fiance and I have finally finished our move out to BFE and we love it! We get to spend even more time together, we both only commute about 4 miles to our prospective jobs, and we are saving tons of money! Anyway, just wanted to check in real quick…and I’ll be writing more when I have more time…ciau!!

Success

How do you measure it? When I was growing up, it was very simple and delineated, based on the different people in my life.

Success according to my Mom:  I would go to a 4-year university right out of high school. Get my degree. Get a high paying, prestigious career that she could brag to her friends about. Meet a man, either in college or at my job and get married. Then, because he would make more than me, obvi, I would quit my job and stay home and raise our 2.5 babies and golden retriever. She was adamant about me going to college, but then she would say things like “you better meet a rich man who can keep you in the lifestyle to which you’ve become accustomed!” Wait…but isn’t that why I was going to college? So that I could keep myself in the lifestyle to which I’ve become accustomed? Why did I need a man to do that? (this is even more odd considering that my mom made almost 2 times what my dad did…so, what gives?)

Success according to my Dad: Again, go to a 4 year university straight out of high school. But he was a little more specific. My dad’s dream was for me to be an engineer. Didn’t matter what kind; mechanical, electrical, aeronautical…didn’t matter, just so long as it was some engineering field. Then get an awesome job working for the government or one of the Big 3 car manufacturers in the country. He didn’t care so much about who I married (just so long as they weren’t taking advantage of me and using me for money), and didn’t even consider the option of me quitting my job to stay home with kids.

Success according to me: When I was in high school (and actually, long before that) I thought success would be a combination of my parents’ thoughts. Of course graduating from a 4 year university was #1. (are you noticing a trend here?) Get a high paying job that I loved and was awesome at. Then get married, but in my vision, my guy would stay home. Or, if not stay home completely, at least have some 2 bit job that didn’t take much time, but would give him some spending money. And he would cook, clean, take care of the babies, and I would bring in the real money. We would live in a nice house in a major city (like in NorCal), have nice cars and basically be able to do whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted. I didn’t think much about this far-off future husband. **In fact, other than the fact that he wouldn’t be as successful as me and would stay home and take care of things there, I didn’t really think of him at all. I’m not sure if this is a dominant thing, a control thing or what, but it really never crossed my mind that I would marry someone that had a better career than me or *gasp* made more money. Maybe that’s because I knew I liked things my way, and if I marry someone who makes less than me, it will always be my way. Because he who makes the money, makes the rules.**

Now, let’s go ahead and take a look at reality. Yes, I went to the 4 year university straight out of college (actually, it was a 5 year school, but same idea). And I went for mechanical engineering. So far, so good following both of my parents’ recipes for success. I got through about 4 years of the 5 year school. Mainly because there was a lot of moving every 3 months, and I was getting burned out. Also because I was doing an internship for the government and pretty much wanted to stab a rusty fork into my eye every day that I had to go to work. Not a good feeling, especially when you know you have another good 40 years of doing the same crap…and you’re not even out of school yet.

So…I quit. (And let me tell you, telling my parents was the worst conversation I’ve ever had in my life). And here I am, over 2 years after deciding not to go back to school. I am engaged to the best man I’ve ever known, whom I wouldn’t have met if I would have stayed in school. He has a wonderful career and makes way more than I do (like, more than double). Because he makes so much more than I do, I am free to have a job that makes me happy. I can do the things that I want to do and that I enjoy. (not right now, in Cali, because when I moved back I just took the first job offered to me, but when we move to BFE, I can pretty much get any job, even if it only pays $10/hr). Meaning, I can be a cell phone salesman (because I LOVE cell phones). Or work in a call center again, which I loved and was really good at. Or be a receptionist. Or basically anything else I want to do.

And I’m happy. I think that was the main thing missing from everyone’s idea of success, even mine. No, I don’t get to tell people I’m a Mechanical Engineer, and see the looks of shock and awe run across their faces. My mom won’t be able to brag to her friends about my career and how much I make. My dad won’t be able to puff his chest out in pride because his daughter graduated from one of the top engineering schools in the nation. But that’s OK. They still love me. They love GTO guy. And they are thrilled that we’re moving back to their state (in fact, I’m living .8 miles away from them), which is no where near a major city of any kind.

So, my life turned out almost exactly opposite of how everyone thought it would. It’s perfect. And successful.

Goodbye Cali

Ok…well, there is something that has been happening behind the scenes in my life right now that I haven’t blogged about yet…mainly because it wasn’t official and I would hate to write about it just to tell everyone that it wasn’t going to happen. So…here it is: GTO guy and I are moving BACK to the state I just came from. At the end of this month.  He has already put in for his transfer and been approved. He already knows what his salary is going to be (and while it is a slight pay cut, it is still more than enough to live comfortably in this other state that is not CA.) We already have an apartment. We already have UHauls rented. It is official. We are moving in about 2 and a half weeks.

Yes, I know this is extremely fast. We have only known of each other’s existence on this planet for 6 months and 3 days. Yes, we’re already engaged and living together right now, but this is a huge deal. This is moving to another state together. He has never even seen this state. I have lived there for about 3 years off and on over the past 5 years. My parents are there. He knows no one there. But me. And my parents. And, well, I know no one there. except my parents, too.

The big thing my friends keep pointing out is that I tried very very hard to get out of that state and back to CA. So why, WHY would I possibly consider moving back?!? Didn’t I hate it there? There were no trees, no water, no ocean, no grass…it was a desert. The people down there either have tons of babies, drink excessively, or do drugs. Or they do all 3. At once. And well, I had to leave because I knew no one and I was bored. I hate being bored. More than anything else, I hate being bored.

But what they don’t get is that now it’s not just about me. It’s about me and GTO guy. We are starting a life together. And we wouldn’t have as good of a life here in CA as we could have in BFE (Bum-Fuck-Egypt, for those who don’t know). I mean, combined, we make over 100K per year. And we are living in an apartment with no dishwasher, no A/C, no washer/drier…and it sucks. And we want better. For us, and for our babies (yes, there will be babies…he’s thinking in 3 years, I’m thinking closer to 5, but either way…). We could afford a house out there, easily. Probably in less than a year( actually, probably now if we wanted to eat Ramen and Mac and Cheese for awhile). In Northern California, though? Um…not for a long, long time. if ever.

In BFE, we’re getting an apartment that’s about 200 sq ft bigger, with A/C, washer and drier IN UNIT and a dishwasher. For about $400 less. I know…it’s amazing.

Now, I love Cali. A lot. I was raised here. It’s gorgeous. I love the diversity of people, cars, beliefs, and cell phones. I love being at the mecca of technology that is Silicon Valley. I love the beach and Great America and the Professional Sports teams. I love that with a 4 hour drive you could be in the mountains or at the beach. I love the weather (even though in the 6 months I’ve been here this time, I think it’s only rained twice, and it’s been insanely hot). I love being at sea level for the drag strip. But, unfortunately, it is just not economical to stay here. CA would bleed us dry. And we would constantly be broke, even though we should be able to be living life high on the hog.

So…we’re gonna do it. BFE, here we come. Goodbye California, I’m going to miss you. I promise we’ll come back to visit!